Brooklyn Bridge

    View of Manhattan

    Found some LOVE Locks on the bridge ❤️

A few weeks ago I finally took a trip down to the iconic Brooklyn Bridge.  I have been wanting to walk the Brooklyn Bridge since my very first trip to New York a few years ago. Now that I live in the city, it only seems fitting to go.  My roommates Will and Danny along with some friends visiting from out of town all decided to make a day of it and head to the Brooklyn Bridge.

As we got closer to the Brooklyn Bridge from the Manhattan side, you first walk along side the highway and soon start to see the infamous arches of the bridge. As you get toward the middle you start to see views of both Manhattan and Brooklyn. It's the most amazing views. For me it was a bit emotional. It was the day after my last day at my job and standing there on the bridge was surreal. It reminded me that in life you can be in between two points and you have the choice as to which one you decide to embark upon. I definitely had some moments of pure happiness as well walking the bridge. To be there with Will, my best friend of over 10+ years, was amazing to experience it together. And a day that I will never forget. 

For anyone visiting or living in New York, the Brooklyn Bridge is a must see! 

XO, Rae 

Status: SINGLE

I can admit, I am still a little damaged from my last serious relationship. I don't feel pity for myself. I just know now exactly what I want and what I don't want out of my next relationship. Just because someone wants to be with you doesn't mean you have to be with them. Your not doing yourself a favor by trying to fill the void in your life. I used to look at failed relationships as a bad thing. I am a product of divorce. I typically have trust issues with men. And I haven't always picked the greatest ones to be with. I now see it as a chance to grow and learn from. I'm not perfect. I've definitely had my faults in past relationships. But all of that has helped to mold me into the person I am today. And because of lessons learned, I am more sure of what I want for myself in the future.

Being single isn't always easy or ideal. Although it is sometimes welcomed. I think being single is often looked at as a negative status. Honestly, I think more women should embrace it. But it's a choice I make. I am willing to stay single for as long as needed. God willing, that won't be forever! I'm not getting any younger. Ha! Now that I am in my thirties, it's more important for me to stay true to myself. I'm not looking for a perfect guy. I just know there are some traits I am not willing to settle for. I have goals, hopes and dreams and I want someone who I can share those with. So ladies, don't be afraid to wait for the love you deserve. 

XO, Rae

10 Things You Learn In Your 30's

I have learned to fully embrace my Thirties and I have to say so far, they have not disappointed. But of course with age comes wisdom. With the help of some friends, I have compiled a list of '10 Things You Learn In Your 30's.'

1.  Embrace who YOU are. 

 By 30 you start to really get to know who you are as a person and what you want out of life. You become an adult so to speak. Your getting your career on point, your paying bills like a boss and dating like a grown woman. Don't be fearful of who you may become. Be open to the possibilities.

2.  Your Mom is always right. -credit: Kristi Evans

 It's bound to happen. You will begin to hear yourself channeling your mother and saying to yourself "She was right!"  I even find that I often apologize to my Mom for thinking that she has no idea what I am going through....what I now realize is that she has already been there and done it. Hence why Mom's give the best advice!

3. You are not missing out on anything. -credit: Billy Berces

 Remember when you got invited to go out with your friends and you were so afraid of missing out you would never say 'NO'. Well those days are over. You just worked a 40+ hour week, your tired, you have nothing to wear and all you really want to do is go home and watch 'The Real Housewives'. Plus you can live vicariously via Facebook and save yourself the hangover. You will thank yourself in the morning!

4. Family is not always blood. -credit: Marisa Liona

 I agree 100% with this! Family does not have to be true to definition. Being family means more than just sharing a last name or a bloodline of relatives. It's about being there for someone and making an effort to be a part of their life. You don't get to pick your family but you do get to pick your friends. If your lucky, some of those friends will become family. 

5.  It's okay to make mistakes. -credit: Billy Berces

 Although you are well into adulthood now. You are still allowed to make mistakes. You don't have to have it all figured out in a perfect pinterest board. Be open to the idea that things will fall apart at times. But more often than not you will find yourself able to pick the pieces quicker. 

6. Sometimes you become the parent for your parents. -credit: Jackie Alfaro

 At some point you will find yourself in a moment of being the parent to your parent(s). Whether it's in giving advice or in caring for them as they get older. Both are more of a reality at this age. You will begin to start to worry about them more often, be ultra protective and have to deal with the fact that they are getting older and will need you more than ever. 

7.  A few good friends are all you really need. 

 At this age it is all about quality NOT quantity. Life is busy and when you do have down time, you want to invest in those who make it worth while. This isn't high school anymore and you don't need to be in a clique. You need real girlfriends that you can laugh with, confide in and drink bottles of wine with no judgment. 

8.  Date yourself.
   
 Ladies, LISTEN UP! You can't expect for someone to love you if you don't love yourself. And sometimes the best way to do that is to date yourself. Meaning put yourself on "a break" and get to know who you are deep down. The only way you are going to know what you want out of a relationship is to know what you have to have offer as well. Try it. I promise you will be a better girlfriend and one day wife for it!

9.  Sex is better in your thirties.  -credit: Jennifer Sears

 Okay so now that you have dated your self and have sworn off men for awhile. Nothing will get you back in the saddle more than having some good sex! It's true, sex is better in your thirties. Maybe its because of all the bad sex you had in your twenties or because your more experienced now? Whatever it is, be thankful! 

10. Your life is NOT over at 30! 

 Contrary to what you may think, turning 30 is not as awful as it may seem. It is possible that your thirties will be some of the best years of your life. Enjoy it because 40 is around the corner. Kidding! 



  XO, Rae



Have some more to add? Comment below. 

Self Check!

Sometimes you just have to look in the mirror, pull yourself together, tell yourself to stop being fearful of the unknown and remind yourself that you are capable of amazing things! LITERALLY had to have that conversation with myself today.

Since I recently resigned from my job and am currently taking a hiatus from the 9-5 world, lately I have been feeling displaced. I'm a planner by nature and I thrive on working and feeling accomplished. So now that I am venturing out to do my own projects. The days are less organized and I have been feeling less accomplished. Fear is also partly to be blamed. It's the fear of not knowing what lies ahead. And I know there will be many hiccups along the way. That's part of the risk of the journey.  But hey everyone has to start from somewhere and I'm pretty sure I'm not the first to have these feelings. For so long I have been so focused on my career that I forgot to focus on what makes me truly happy. I hope to accomplish much success with this blog and my handbag designs one day. Giving life to these two things is what gets me excited everyday. So I plan to do everything I can to make it a reality for myself. Sometimes in life you have to push yourself harder. Nothing worth having comes easy. 

XO, Rae

The One That Got Away

Ladies, have you ever thought to your self "what if he was the one?"  Let's face it, we have all dated a guy in the past and then later in life started to wonder could he be the one that got away?! 

In this case it's kinda reversed. I've had 2 guys that I've dated in the past that have at one time or another seeked me out again and have said the exact words of "I've always wondered what it would be like if we were still together?" It's somewhat flattering and somewhat frustrating. Is it because they have failed relationships and want to reach back into their past? Or is it because they truly feel that way now? 

Some would say that exes are that for a reason. And we all know that relationships end for all sorts of reasons. In my case both relationships didn't end on bad terms. They simply ended because at the time we were young and in different places in our lives. So it does beg the question: What if?

I think as women we tend to struggle with this question sometimes. Wondering if we passed up on "the one" or wonder could it be different now that both people are older and maybe wiser? 

We all know the phrase "leave the past in the past". Why dig up old feelings and make them fit into your present life?  But I'm sure in some scenarios it has worked out for some couples. Maybe rekindling the flame years later is not such an awful idea if both people are invested in it. 

So I say you be the judge of your own heart. You never know, YOU could be the one that got away.❤️

XO, 

Rae 

The Friends We Keep

Once you are in your thirties you realize that a few true friends are better than the twenty you used to have. I think it's important that women have a close group of girlfriends.I have an amazing group of girlfriends! Most of my girlfriends, I met when I was in my twenties. Your twenties are usually your unstable years. When you're partying, making up, breaking up and trying to figure out your life. If your friends can see you at this stage of your life and still stick around after, they are keepers! 

All of my girlfriends have this in common, they are loyal and have a genuine interest in my life. I feel that is a must when it comes to friendship. Often we surround ourselves with friends who are too caught up in their own life to take notice of ours. Friendship should be 50/50. It takes work just like any relationship. But in the end you want to feel they are just as invested in your life as you are in theirs. As women, I think it's important to have a well rounded group of girlfriends. I mean if all of your friends were alike, that would be pretty boring right?

One of my girlfriends is a few years younger than me. We are complete opposites in most aspects. She is bold, has never met a stranger and loves the outdoors. I'm more shy and quiet at first and not very outdoorsy unless it involves drinking on a patio. But we get each other on a level of passion for life. We both have recently moved to new states in efforts to chase our dreams. It's nice to share those experiences with a friend who understands it first hand. 

One my girlfriends that I have known the longest, I met at my first medical office job. She is soft spoken, smart, a great mother and can fix almost anything. Seriously, she can put most men to shame. She has taught me a lot about medical and we both connected over our passion for working in the medical field. We have leaned on each other through heartbreaks and been there to help pick up the pieces afterward. She has been my wing woman at the bars when we were both single and on the prowl. We have had some great times and share stories only we can tell. 

Another one of my girlfriends is my ride or die friend. Every girl needs one. That friend that never judges you or your mistakes. She is kind, funny, outspoken and doesn't let many people into her life easily. I consider myself lucky to be called her friend. She helped me to work through my past relationship with my ex and has always been a great sounding board. She is always honest when giving advice and that is what I love most about her. We have seen each other go through some difficult times in our lives. And we have celebrated many of life's happy moments like her newly born daughter. She is so worthy of becoming a mother. She reminds me that life is full of unknowns but you still have to ride it out. 

My best friend I saved for last. She is the most selfless person I have ever met. She is thoughtful, funny, kindhearted and will surprise you with her karaoke skills to 80's and 90's music. She will sing Salt -N- Pepa's "PUSH IT" like nobody's business. We could do nothing but sit in her living room and drink wine all night and be perfectly content. She and I like to do simple things like go to festivals, eat cheap mexican food, drink margaritas and craft things. Although she is now a busy Mom, she always makes time for our friendship. We just get each other and never have to apologize for what we say or think. She is like a sister to me. Friends who become family are the best types of friends. I can see us both sitting on a porch well into our 50's sipping wine. 

Life is too short not to be surrounded by great friends. I cannot imagine my life without my girlfriends. I am nothing without them by my side. 

XO, Rae

Personal Growth

Living in New York has made me realize a few things about myself. I am way more comfortable outside of my comfort zone than I have ever been before. New York exposes you to so much more in every day life. You are constantly surrounded by people. It's true, your personal space is completely invaded most of the time. From crowded streets, subway stations and even grocery stores.  But the great thing is that you have a lot more chances in meeting some amazing people. Everyday is like a new experience filled with new opportunities.

I have also learned to embrace change head on. Change used to be something that made me feel anxious and I often avoided it. I had a lot of change in my childhood and I think that made me fearful of change in my adult life. (I'll go into more of that later) I have settled into the City and adapted to my new life pretty well in the past 8 months. Moving in general can be overwhelming but moving to New York adds a whole new level. Smaller space, roommates, no car, public transportation, longer work hours....the list goes on! All of which now seem "normal" to me. I love living here in the City and for once I welcome the change that comes with it.

Fear of failure is also something I am learning to let go of. I no longer want to say "What If?" I want to live the life I imagine for myself and put my fears aside. It can be scary to chase dreams but having regrets are scarier. I would rather say that I tried and failed than have never tried at all. I'm learning that the journey is more important than the end result. I've created this Blog to document my journey in NYC and in hopes that women can relate to the honesty of embracing your thirties. In addition I am writing a book based on relationships, friendships and lessons learned. My goal is to one day publish my book. 

I guess you can say New York has changed me. Or maybe it's that I've allowed myself to be more open to this experience. Either way, I'm grateful for the growth.


XO, Rae

Chasing Dreams

Let's back up to about 8 months ago...

When I left Atlanta and moved to NY....I had just resigned from my job of 8 1/2 years.  I worked in medical as a manager for a large private practice. This was my career. I had worked hard over the years and loved what I did. I like making a difference and being there for people. 

I've always thought being a manager can have its challenges but it also has its rewards. There are days you question everything and days you feel like you've conquered it all. 

I took a chance moving here without a job. I wanted to move first, get adjusted to the City and then seek out a job. I saved up money so I knew I would be okay for awhile until I found something. After 3 weeks of living here, I was getting restless staying at home and was eager to get back to work. But of course I had fears. What if I couldn't land a job in NY? What if I wasn't good enough for the same type position?  What if? 

These doubts were running thru my mind but I knew I had to put myself out there first to see what I was up against.

To my surprise, once I started putting my resume out there, I got some very encouraging feedback. Within a 2 week period I was hired and starting my new job right before thanksgiving. The company was similar to the one I had worked for in Atlanta. The position was a step up from my previous job and was going to be more challenging. This excited me! I was ready for something new. I was ecstatic to have landed such a huge position with this company. I didn't think I would be so lucky so soon. After all, I moved to New York for bigger & better. (So cliche, I know) but it was true. 

I've been with the company for a little over 6 months now. I feel like I've given it my best. I recently resigned. Although I love the company, I've come to find that it's just not the right fit for me. For those who know me, knows this decision does not come easy. I have never quit a job like this. I pride myself on my work. Hell work consumes my life most of the time. I'm working on this! 

But what I have come to realize, is happiness out weighs everything else in life. As I finish up my last week of work, I am unsure of my next move for the first time in my life. And I'm strangely calm about the situation. I feel that I have learned a lot about myself these past few months since moving to New York. I'm not afraid of change anymore. I've already been pushed outside my comfort level and have done great so far. I have dreams of finishing a book I'm writing, continuing this blog and one day designing my own handbags. And who knows what else will come my way! 

As they say in life, sometimes you have to close one door before another one opens. I'm hoping this is true. I feel inspired again to create the life I want. 

No one ever said chasing dreams would be easy but they did promise it would be worth it! 

XO, Rae

Welcome!

Hi, My name is Dana Rae, I am 32 years old and I recently moved to New York City. I'll explain more later on how I got here...Blogging is new for me but what I hope to accomplish is a blog full of real life stories, inspiration for women, favorites and all things New York. 
So Ladies, grab a glass of wine & let's get started!

Moving to New York....

Moving to New York has been by far the best decision I have ever made. Well...I say that now, maybe I should wait til I have lived here for at least a year, lol. Moving here was not always part of my plan but life changes sometimes and here I am.
Up until 7 months ago, I was living in Atlanta, Ga..I had a great job, amazing friends and a nice apartment right outside of the city. So what changed?! Well...I changed. Two and half years ago, before turning 30, I began to see my life differently unlike before. I was a few years out of a long term relationship that was on again off again for longer than I like to admit to.


When I was with my ex, I was so sure of my life, my career and wanting to be married and have kids. I had always thought that I would be married and have kids before 30. I think most women feel the pressure of this for all sorts of reasons. But turning 30 was a game changer for me. I stopped worrying about where I was in life and started to focus on where I was going in life. For me, I was so worried about trying to have this list of accomplishments by the time I turned 30 and then realized that my life was just starting. I let go of my preconceived ideas and I let myself be. I actually came to New York to visit my best friend Will (who I live with now) and celebrate my 30th Birthday.


I had no idea then that almost 2 years later I would be moving here to NY. Will had been trying to get me to move to NY for a few years. I would nicely say to him "maybe" but really knowing in the back of my mind that I had no intentions of moving. (He knew that as well but he still tried to convince me). At that time I was still content with my life in Atlanta and was ready to see what 30 had to offer. I would visit NY a few more times after my 30th Birthday, falling more in love with NY each time. And then upon another big change in my life, I soon realized that maybe New York wasn't a bad idea after all.


My Grandfather passed last year May 24th, 2014. A day that I will never forget. He was an amazing man. He traveled the world, had a very successful career and made a name for himself. He was known by a rare nickname and was the life of the party. Shortly before his passing, I had told him about the possibility of me moving to NY. He was surprisingly very excited for me. He traveled to NY often throughout his life and had nothing but great things to say and stories to tell about his trips here. I was still unsure myself if I would actually go through with it but when he passed, I knew I had to do it. Not just for him, but for me. His passing changed my life in more ways than one. But mostly he had always instilled in me to never have regrets in life. He lived life so passionately and I wanted to do the same. So fast forward to October 2014, I packed up an SUV with my Mom and my best friend Will along side me and I moved to New York. It was 19 hours traveled up the east coast and at 3am October 10th, 2014, I officially became a New Yorker.