Self Check!

Sometimes you just have to look in the mirror, pull yourself together, tell yourself to stop being fearful of the unknown and remind yourself that you are capable of amazing things! LITERALLY had to have that conversation with myself today.

Since I recently resigned from my job and am currently taking a hiatus from the 9-5 world, lately I have been feeling displaced. I'm a planner by nature and I thrive on working and feeling accomplished. So now that I am venturing out to do my own projects. The days are less organized and I have been feeling less accomplished. Fear is also partly to be blamed. It's the fear of not knowing what lies ahead. And I know there will be many hiccups along the way. That's part of the risk of the journey.  But hey everyone has to start from somewhere and I'm pretty sure I'm not the first to have these feelings. For so long I have been so focused on my career that I forgot to focus on what makes me truly happy. I hope to accomplish much success with this blog and my handbag designs one day. Giving life to these two things is what gets me excited everyday. So I plan to do everything I can to make it a reality for myself. Sometimes in life you have to push yourself harder. Nothing worth having comes easy. 

XO, Rae

Personal Growth

Living in New York has made me realize a few things about myself. I am way more comfortable outside of my comfort zone than I have ever been before. New York exposes you to so much more in every day life. You are constantly surrounded by people. It's true, your personal space is completely invaded most of the time. From crowded streets, subway stations and even grocery stores.  But the great thing is that you have a lot more chances in meeting some amazing people. Everyday is like a new experience filled with new opportunities.

I have also learned to embrace change head on. Change used to be something that made me feel anxious and I often avoided it. I had a lot of change in my childhood and I think that made me fearful of change in my adult life. (I'll go into more of that later) I have settled into the City and adapted to my new life pretty well in the past 8 months. Moving in general can be overwhelming but moving to New York adds a whole new level. Smaller space, roommates, no car, public transportation, longer work hours....the list goes on! All of which now seem "normal" to me. I love living here in the City and for once I welcome the change that comes with it.

Fear of failure is also something I am learning to let go of. I no longer want to say "What If?" I want to live the life I imagine for myself and put my fears aside. It can be scary to chase dreams but having regrets are scarier. I would rather say that I tried and failed than have never tried at all. I'm learning that the journey is more important than the end result. I've created this Blog to document my journey in NYC and in hopes that women can relate to the honesty of embracing your thirties. In addition I am writing a book based on relationships, friendships and lessons learned. My goal is to one day publish my book. 

I guess you can say New York has changed me. Or maybe it's that I've allowed myself to be more open to this experience. Either way, I'm grateful for the growth.


XO, Rae

Chasing Dreams

Let's back up to about 8 months ago...

When I left Atlanta and moved to NY....I had just resigned from my job of 8 1/2 years.  I worked in medical as a manager for a large private practice. This was my career. I had worked hard over the years and loved what I did. I like making a difference and being there for people. 

I've always thought being a manager can have its challenges but it also has its rewards. There are days you question everything and days you feel like you've conquered it all. 

I took a chance moving here without a job. I wanted to move first, get adjusted to the City and then seek out a job. I saved up money so I knew I would be okay for awhile until I found something. After 3 weeks of living here, I was getting restless staying at home and was eager to get back to work. But of course I had fears. What if I couldn't land a job in NY? What if I wasn't good enough for the same type position?  What if? 

These doubts were running thru my mind but I knew I had to put myself out there first to see what I was up against.

To my surprise, once I started putting my resume out there, I got some very encouraging feedback. Within a 2 week period I was hired and starting my new job right before thanksgiving. The company was similar to the one I had worked for in Atlanta. The position was a step up from my previous job and was going to be more challenging. This excited me! I was ready for something new. I was ecstatic to have landed such a huge position with this company. I didn't think I would be so lucky so soon. After all, I moved to New York for bigger & better. (So cliche, I know) but it was true. 

I've been with the company for a little over 6 months now. I feel like I've given it my best. I recently resigned. Although I love the company, I've come to find that it's just not the right fit for me. For those who know me, knows this decision does not come easy. I have never quit a job like this. I pride myself on my work. Hell work consumes my life most of the time. I'm working on this! 

But what I have come to realize, is happiness out weighs everything else in life. As I finish up my last week of work, I am unsure of my next move for the first time in my life. And I'm strangely calm about the situation. I feel that I have learned a lot about myself these past few months since moving to New York. I'm not afraid of change anymore. I've already been pushed outside my comfort level and have done great so far. I have dreams of finishing a book I'm writing, continuing this blog and one day designing my own handbags. And who knows what else will come my way! 

As they say in life, sometimes you have to close one door before another one opens. I'm hoping this is true. I feel inspired again to create the life I want. 

No one ever said chasing dreams would be easy but they did promise it would be worth it! 

XO, Rae